Let the butter 'fly...
Hello lovelies,
Its good to have something to write about today. After that post on Wednesday, I got more than 10 responses; some sharing experiences, some giving solidarity and some giving advice. I can't even explain how grateful I was to have got that number of responses. Thank you again.
Have you seen butter fly? Lol. Is it even possible? I let my own butter fly!
How?
Today, I'm here with feedback.
So yesterday, I had to talk with my then boo to keep in touch as usual. We spoke via video calls for about 30 minutes and it was a pure 30 minutes of fun and love. We decided to move to What's App to continue and the gist started going south. I had had enough of changing conversations when it started taking the sexual turn so I went "You see, I want to do all this with you too when I see you and I miss you so much I can't wait to jump into your arms but I can't do all this. I am a different breed and I am not going to try to fit into the world's expectation of me". WOW! That was so much burden lifted off me. He said, "I don't know what to say". Note that, we've had this discussion a number of times and we would always say when we see, we will know what to do. I knew that that couldn't be the case again. I told him it wasn't wise to keep pushing the conversation for the next time we get to see and we needed to know what obtained if we were going to stay together. He said "Lola, if I decide to stay, I will cheat and it's not in my nature. I love you".
That was the end!
I had earlier told him I understood whatever decision he had to make and it was fine by me, no matter the outcome but..... I expected him to stay.
Why wouldn't he stay? After all, he's a Christian too and he should have been willing to abstain because we were after all going to get a better end to all this. Or didn't he read in his bible that marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled". Was it only me God was speaking to in that passage? Wait! Why am I waiting at all? I need a relationship. Can't I just compromise this once? Ki lo de gaan sef? All these ran through my mind till I broke down in tears. I didn't even know I was crying till I had cried for about 15 minutes while voicing out my frustrations to my best friend, Jesus. I needed to let it out. I sent a message to Chichi and she called back, called my name three times, asked if I was fine and spoke to me. I regained my confidence in Christ asap.
I slept, woke this morning and went to What's App status and guess what I saw from Chichi....
"I don't know who you are..
But for some reason,
Your heaviness is the reason I'm still up at this hour.
Be still.
All your beautiful dreams will come to reality in accordance to His will for your life.
Don't stop trusting Him."
I sent my message two minutes later.
You know what this tells me?
God sees my every tears and He has my back always.
My butter flew and I am fine with it.
Enough of me. How are you/ did you managing(e) your single days?
Do share.
Remember to leave a comment.
It's your right and my joy.
Cheers to life.
Image: Picture of me taken by Oyekunle photography @Suncity estate.
Its good to have something to write about today. After that post on Wednesday, I got more than 10 responses; some sharing experiences, some giving solidarity and some giving advice. I can't even explain how grateful I was to have got that number of responses. Thank you again.
Have you seen butter fly? Lol. Is it even possible? I let my own butter fly!
How?
Today, I'm here with feedback.
So yesterday, I had to talk with my then boo to keep in touch as usual. We spoke via video calls for about 30 minutes and it was a pure 30 minutes of fun and love. We decided to move to What's App to continue and the gist started going south. I had had enough of changing conversations when it started taking the sexual turn so I went "You see, I want to do all this with you too when I see you and I miss you so much I can't wait to jump into your arms but I can't do all this. I am a different breed and I am not going to try to fit into the world's expectation of me". WOW! That was so much burden lifted off me. He said, "I don't know what to say". Note that, we've had this discussion a number of times and we would always say when we see, we will know what to do. I knew that that couldn't be the case again. I told him it wasn't wise to keep pushing the conversation for the next time we get to see and we needed to know what obtained if we were going to stay together. He said "Lola, if I decide to stay, I will cheat and it's not in my nature. I love you".
That was the end!
I had earlier told him I understood whatever decision he had to make and it was fine by me, no matter the outcome but..... I expected him to stay.
Why wouldn't he stay? After all, he's a Christian too and he should have been willing to abstain because we were after all going to get a better end to all this. Or didn't he read in his bible that marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled". Was it only me God was speaking to in that passage? Wait! Why am I waiting at all? I need a relationship. Can't I just compromise this once? Ki lo de gaan sef? All these ran through my mind till I broke down in tears. I didn't even know I was crying till I had cried for about 15 minutes while voicing out my frustrations to my best friend, Jesus. I needed to let it out. I sent a message to Chichi and she called back, called my name three times, asked if I was fine and spoke to me. I regained my confidence in Christ asap.
I slept, woke this morning and went to What's App status and guess what I saw from Chichi....
"I don't know who you are..
But for some reason,
Your heaviness is the reason I'm still up at this hour.
Be still.
All your beautiful dreams will come to reality in accordance to His will for your life.
Don't stop trusting Him."
I sent my message two minutes later.
You know what this tells me?
God sees my every tears and He has my back always.
My butter flew and I am fine with it.
Enough of me. How are you/ did you managing(e) your single days?
Do share.
Remember to leave a comment.
It's your right and my joy.
Cheers to life.
Image: Picture of me taken by Oyekunle photography @Suncity estate.
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